That blank page...

A paradox of complex feelings.

I found painting my art journal with inks a good way to ‘start’ and feel it was okay to experiment. Photograph of my works by Lauren Peters, 2023.

I am sitting on my sunny brightly coloured yellow chair with my feet barefoot, one resting on a rattan ottoman next to a pile of artsy things I have not yet put away from a photoshoot (not as flash as it sounds) yet, it was joyously colourful and quiet. I was alone in my newly tidy space and taking a bunch of selfies with a tripod and pressing the timer on my Apple watch like a remote to initiate ‘the shot’ hoping I won’t look silly.

When you attend one of my arts-based workshops in high pigment inks, whether you like it or not – I will spend time at the beginning explaining the unique qualities of the medium and introduce some theory about the chosen theme of the session (like pattern design, still life, mixing colour, florals, food, geometric abstraction, or completely free and abstract forms). When children are in the room and faced with a blank canvas (we normally use heavyweight watercolour paper), they ask with confidence “can we start now?” and take charge boldly mixing colours and chatting to me about all sorts and sometimes start giggling with each other if they came with a friend or sibling. So what about the adults? It might be an unsurprising contrast that some adults are very reluctant, and announce they “are not creative” and noting for me not to judge their skill level (artistic) and lack any confident expectations that they may leave the workshop with new knowledge and perhaps a sense of achievement. This makes me quite sad and at times feeling somewhat defeated by these perceptions of individual creativity using art mediums and self-expression.

What would happen if you filled that entire sheet of paper with meaningless squiggles, scratchings, and obscure forms? No one judges a dancer for spending at least 30 minutes (often longer) warming up and stretching in order to condition their muscles ready for their rehearsals or a performance, or simply spend an entire session working to improve their flexibility. Sidenote: I can’t tell you how long it took me to master side splits and a roll through (if you know, you know!). I feel the same way about a creative arts practice and think it is very important to spend just as much time experimenting and exploring your ideas, mediums, and pondering what’s next. You don’t always get the time to explore fully, and I know all too well about putting things off because you have ‘a real job’ to pursue. If you don’t start a new project, apply for that job, go for a walk so you can build your fitness (you like the idea of Couch to 5k), or put a mark on that blank canvas – you won’t be able to fail at that task.

Large or small, in many ways you might be avoiding something that could give you a lot of joy and fulfilment. It might be necessary then to pause watching that next episode or pop something on that is familiar but not distracting and make a mark on that blank page, soon enough it will be full of more marks if you give yourself some time. The momentum comes from making a solid start and then you can get into a rhythm and more ideas come from that deliberate action. If you think to yourself that it is just ‘play’ then you take the perceived seriousness of potentially making a mistake.

I am guilty of having bought lovely journals to ideate in and don’t, I know you have too because we have chatted about this fear of mucking the pages of a beautiful piece of stationery with ideas or sketches that seem silly or rudimentary. Dare I say it, what if someone finds them one day down the track in some form or another! What will they think? Does it matter? It is a place where you are explaining your ideas to yourself and can be as conversational as you like, whatever method of annotations, instructions, stories will help you sketch out or plan the next step.

I may have mentioned to some of you before, but studying art and design formally made me loathe handwritten annotations in my visual diaries. I know this was one of the key ways my assessors could gain a clear understanding of my concepts and align these explanations alongside an academic rubric to demonstrate my skills and knowledge. Little did I appreciate back then that it was also very valid (even if there were spelling mistakes) to explore my ideas to MYSELF! The place you put your ideas down, isn’t a place to put yourself down! So, let’s make some new marks without the fear and seriousness of adulthood. What would you like to do next?

I have started a new thread to explore some of these ideas with you in our private chat for those who are paid subscribers, let’s talk through some of those stumbling blocks.

Comment below what you would like to explore here next week and I will see what I can come up with!